Online Fun and Business

I have no need to point out what time of year it is. It’s time for us coaches to come out and say to you, “Will you fulfill your intentions for your new year?”

If you have a history of New Year resolutions that do not come to fruition by the end of each year then you may even be about to skip this article and move on to something less challenging!

Let me celebrate with you - our last year was a complete success. We totally produced the results to which we were committed. There is no such thing as “failure”; there is only “feedback”.

What is it that finds us reproducing results or similar outcomes year after year? For me, the words congruency, authenticity, belief, resolution and acceptance, spring to mind.
In the moment that a goal is declared, what does the “little voice” say? What is the automatic response of our subconscious? There’s a part of our minds that “knows us” so well that it keeps our “identity” intact and that is in fact, its primary job.

Therefore the first job that we need to assign to our aware and conscious mind is to resolutely “choose” the intended outcome. We need to get a crystal, clear description of what we want and express it in a context that we can wholly accept. For example, as an alternative to “I make $80,000 per year”, consider shifting your language a little and say, “In 2006 I choose fun ways to effortlessly and easily accept $80,000”.

The difference lies not in the target itself, rather what your subconscious will do with your declaration. The moment you state an overtly affirmative goal such as, “I make $80,000 per year” you can already hear the internal whisperings and thoughts that strongly negate the utterance. However, what are the likely negatives to arise in the subconscious when instead we say, “In 2006 I choose fun ways to effortlessly and easily accept $80,000”?

Consider that the creation of a goal is a marketing strategy tool for selling new beliefs and ideas to your subconscious. The larger the goal, the more effective an advertiser that you will need to be.

In a nutshell, here are a few other pointers for designing goals that have more clout with the subconscious:

state them in the affirmative; avoid comparative language such as ‘more than’; be as specific as is possible and avoid general statements; include vocabulary that triggers positive emotion; share the goal only with a fan club and not ‘friends’ who squash your ideas or talk you out of pursuing your dreams; include all the aspects of your life in your goal setting; set goals that provide you a little challenge and stretch yet that fall short of leaving you unmotivated; your goals ought only be about you and things within your realm of influence; always state ‘what you want’ and leave out any references to ‘what you don’t want’; check that your goals are ‘moving toward’ goals rather than goals that are ‘moving away’ from something.

Consider too, adding the following lines to each of your intended targets: “I accept this or something better and I ask that whatever takes place is for the highest good of myself and everyone else involved.”

Remember that whatever you focus on WILL expand - so watch your language!

©Thea Westra is an international life coach who resides in Perth, Western Australia. She is editor and publisher of a free, monthly newsletter that you can receive by going to her website http://www.forwardsteps.com.au
Thea also publishes a few blogs, visit here http://inspiration-daily.blogspot.com/ for directional links to each.

In surprisingly short supply, consider some ways to increase personal confidence.

What makes self-confidence in a leader important? Without it, a leader cannot embrace change or take on difficult assignments. With it, a leader has a presence that helps her to “stand out”, strengthen and support others in order to multiply leadership. Strong leaders with high self-confidence do not hesitate to move forward and make important decisions immediately without fear of the outcome. People are watching, and a leader who shows lack of self-confidence is considered weak.

So how to cope with a lack of self-confidence?

Some leaders may attempt to fake their way through it.

Effective leaders have learned the importance of the following:

• Focus on personal and organizational strengths: traditional leadership development programs have focused on gaps. With the advent of positive psychology and some of the work of the Gallup organization, this is changing. Consider your strengths and the gaps will take care of themselves.

• Be willing to be relentless in decision-making, face the consequences and move on: Not making decisions or second-guessing is a sure-fire way to continue to wallow in low self-esteem. Taking action provides the confidence needed to make subsequent decisions.

• Learn from mistakes: since mistakes are inevitable, change your thinking from “what went wrong?” to “how can I learn from what went wrong?”

• Celebrate the outcomes: how often do we do this? An often neglected activity, learn to celebrate in the way that works best for you and your team. Even less than perfect outcomes should be celebrated with emphasis on what went right.

• Make sure you surround yourself and rely on smart people: enough said.

• Find someone you can confide in, reflect with, and do it regularly (schedule it).

Where do you find someone to confide in? Finding a confidante may be the hardest to act on. Vulnerability must be admitted to ask for help. Aren’t leaders supposed to have all the answers? Why would they need someone to confide in? Leaders don’t have all the answers (just like anyone … ) and making the time to confide and reflect assists in clarifying situations and finding the answers - leading to increased self confidence.
You may find a colleague that is an exceptional non-judgmental listener - perhaps you have a friend or relative who will fit the bill. Hiring a coach trained in the skill set of coaching may be the best answer.

As President of Aspire Collaborative Services, Mary Jo Asmus is a Leadership Expert, Executive Coach and Business Consultant who partners with Senior Leaders, “High Potentials”, and their teams, to support them in achieving their goals in business excellence. Mary Jo’s global Fortune 500 background in business areas as diverse as human resources; research and development; organizational development; and business strategy allow her to provide valuable insights about individuals and organizational systems.

Mary Jo is known for her professionalism, honesty and integrity. Her style is supportive and focused on the results needed to reach and surpass individual and organizational goals. Her passion for collaborative partnership and discovering strengths facilitate action suited specifically for the individual and team. More information is available at http://www.aspire-cs.com.

Here’s a question for you:

What would you like to have accomplished 100 days from now?

Why 100 days from now?

Well, why not? Besides, 100 is a nice round number.

You might think, “That’s not enough time. What can I possibly accomplish in only 100 days?”

Very much if you put your mind to it and use the right tools.

So what would you like to accomplish in the next 100 days?

Would it be:

Begin to save money. If you simply gave up that soda and/or candy bar each day, that $1-plus would be more than $100 by the end of the year.

Get rid of that excess weight you have been carrying around? Sure, it would be nice if you could get rid of a pound a day, just like saving a dollar a day. Though it doesn’t work that way, you could be well on your way to getting rid of that extra weight.

Start the business of which you have always dreamed.

Get your priorities in order.

Change a destructive pattern in an important relationship.

Break a bad habit and replace it with a positive one.

Whatever it may be for you, there are certain key rules that should be followed to achieve your goals. Here are just a few to get you started:

The Rule of Ink - The dullest ink is stronger than the sharpest memory. In other words, write down your goals. Commit them to paper. Just this simple action greatly increases the likelihood of meeting your goals.

The Rule of Work - Richard Bach said “There is no such thing as a wish without the power to make it come true. You may have to work for it, however.” Goals require work, as do many things worth doing.

The Rule of Dreams - It has been said that “a goal is a dream with a deadline.” One of the keys to successfully achieving goals is to have a deadline that other people know about. This will help hold you accountable. And then if you really want to change your life, achieve the goal before the deadline.

The Rule of Persistence - In the battle between the rock and the river, the river always wins. Not because the river is stronger, but because the river has the power of persistence. Stick with it! Don’t die of thirst a few feet from the water fountain.

The Rule of Action - Never leave the place where you set a goal without taking some action toward it. This prevents the No. 1 goal stealer _ procrastination _ from setting in, and it creates momentum toward your goal. Then, keep taking action and taking action and taking action and taking some more action.

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.